Accepting What Is

It's natural for "things" to happen to us as we go through our lives. But when these things happen to us, we feel compelled to judge or label them. A shortage of money is "bad." Lack of activity is "boring". A breakup is "depressing."

We like our labels so much that we begin to associate emotions with them, in Pavlovian fashion. The word "down" and "broke" trigger anxiety, as effective as incantations to conjure demons.

Whenever these things happen to me, I remind myself that it happens to everyone. I am not alone. I will suffer, but more importantly, I will accept what is happening.

Now *there's* a key concept to moving on: accepting what is.

If we can accept that ice cream and chocolate bring good memories, then we should be able to accept that what is happening is a natural part of living, and will soon also pass.

But it's easy to say, hard to do. Sometimes I resist what is happening to me so much that I get angry and frustrated at my situation. Then I "all alone beweep my outcast state," as Bill wrote, and think that why, of all beings, should this happen to me.

It reaches a point when I feel like all tragic characters in movies and books have been compressed into one person-sized package and thrown at me.

Eckhart Tolle: "In the state of surrender (accepting what is), you see very clearly what needs to be done, and you take action, doing one thing at a time and focusing on one thing at a time. Learn from nature: See how everything gets accomplished and how the miracle of life unfolds without dissatisfaction or unhappiness."

Once in a while I get blessed enough to be sent gentle reminders. Yesterday while walking to the office from a very tiring day, I saw a bird resting on the sidewalk in the middle of the busy, polluted Ortigas street. It chirped and flew away, unaffected, without dissatisfaction or unhappiness.

I took a deep breath, felt the air fill my lungs and realized I had been unconsciously frowning again, forcing a mild, unconscious headache. I walked on with a smile on my face.